Gravity

written and directed by Alfonso Cuarón (2013)

I was born shortly before Neil Armstrong walked on the moon, so I grew up steeped in the mystique and glamour of the astronaut. I think every kid of my generation had dreams of being an astronaut, at least until we realized how much talent and work that would entail. This movie is about as close as you can get to the experience of what that would actually be like in terms of the amazing visuals. For sure, it's a gorgeous, spectacular, technical achievement, but I don't know that it's a very accurate portrayal of what those space folk get up to task wise though. In fact I doubt that it is, because it for sure isn't accurate in depicting how I imagine astronauts would behave under the circumstances presented in the flick.

Sandra Bullock commands the most screen time, but she's framed as a doofus in comparison to the mission commander played by George Clooney. It's his last mission and he's channeling his usual charm of the cock of the spacewalk, and has oodles of experience compared to the neophyte startrekker, Bullock. She was recruited to install some kind of medical scanner of her design, that has been repurposed for space use, so she's a genius engineer.  As Clooney says, NASA doesn't waste it's time on uselessness. However she sure doesn't act like she's got any brains in her head for much of the flick. I kept thinking, did she even go to astronaut school? She's mentions that she had 6 months of astronaut training, but whatever for that, because the whole movie she's bumbling her way through one crisis to the next, doing DUMB things. I kept groaning at the way she was written. It was just way too much like misogynistic, WOMAN DRIVER bullshit. Especially since there was no need to have her making stupid mistakes either - the beauty of a space tale, is with the setting being such a hostile environment, things could just HAPPEN without the need for human error.

Bullock's character does have an arc - she's lost a child and since then has been living a very circumscribed life - just working.  Not living to work, or working to live - work is the only thing that keeps her going.  So literally and virtually, she's lost in space. And the way this is resolved I found irksome too, because when she regains her will to live, through a spiritual moment - she gives credit to CLOONEY, for choices she makes on her own. Ok, these are aspects of spirituality that I can get behind - to honour the ineffable and have a sense of awe or transcendence, also a feeling of connection to the people we love who have passed, and it's great too to recognize that we don't do anything on our own, but build on the work of others.  Unfortunately,  I thought that the movie framed these spiritual truths in a very dualistic male/female manner with her being the ignoramus and receiver of edjumacations - the usual humble female role thang eh?  

And there was also the fact that the first guy to die - the red shirt - well he had a brown face. And the bad guys in this could have just been asteroids, or circumstance,  but NO - they're RUSSIANS cluttering up the orbital areas of the earth with their malfunctioning space junk. Too sexist, too white, too Manifestdestiny Pro-American. Still it looked real good, and it's exciting as hell. I think it's going to be especially enjoyable for those not prone to notice its embedded disdain for women.

I just found out about this short film made Alfonso Cuarón's son Jonas - he's also the co-writer of Gravity.

I really liked seeing this mirror perspective to the same scene from Gravity, because in the film, I didn't understand the language of who it was she was talking to when she was undergoing her egoic death. I had assumed he was Chinese, maybe a Laplander. I had an inkling it was somewhere Northern because of the dogs, but that was just guessing. What I did understand was that he was a simple man who had a family. And what's the point of this scene? I think this high tech flick about a women who is not in touch with her needs, contains this portrayal of Native People because the Cuaróns are using them to represent a "natural" life style, where human relations are paramount over ego, and its concerns for achievement.  That's what movie folk tend to use us Indigenous types for anyhow - spiritual shorthand for living in balance with nature. This is something that is a timely and important value, and since it's a concept that is so undervalued in current society, the fact that the NDN's are invisible is actually quite appropriate.

Further thoughts based on a comment I left on  Outlaw Vern's Gravity review :

Spoilers….I had a lot of problems with Gravity and they all related to gender. I really didn’t like how incompetently Bullock was framed in context with Clooney. She was always doing STUPID stuff,  at first being the stumbling, bumbling, screaming, female being rescued and hauled around by Clooney, and then doing her usual flustered lady thang, in reaction to the implacable relentless monster – space. After some thought though, and after seeing the short film Cuaron’s son did – it shows the conversation Bullock has with the guy on Earth from his perspective – I came around to understanding that aspect being a direct result and possible subversion of patriarchal gender values. Yes, the way she was portrayed had too much of the awfulness of gender stereotyping, but she could just as easily have been a male character. I think the choice of casting the role as a woman was deliberate: not because women are incompetent compared to men, but largely because patriarchal values read women as having a higher humanistic capacity BECAUSE of their gender and life giving caregiver roles.  It’s more the norm for women to have feelings, than to repress them, and for them to be vulnerable and grow is also more acceptable. That these aspects of herself were parts she had lost and rejected, set the arc of her character's growth, and framed the moral message of the film - to reify the importance of our connection to others, the earth and the environment. In some ways it might have been more of a push back against gender stereotyping to have a male character transforming this way, but I think having a woman navigate the vacuum of space jockey ego achievement, gave more strength overall to the rejection of the patriarchal systems that puts so much weight on things that have very little to do with the rest of society. True her return could also be read as her failure to get er done up there, and a call out to "get back to the kitchen and make sammiches",  but that's a small mind response, and really what's more important than making sure our kitchen - the earth - is looked after, and each other too.

Dial M for Murder

directed by Alfred Hitchcock (1954)

I got kinda bored with this one.  It's too easy to figure out, and you gottta wade through a whole lotta yadayada before you get to the denouement satisfactions.

Ray Milland is defintinely evil, and nasty, greeedy, coldhearted, so I wanted to see him suffer.  He's always got the stiff upper lip though, so his suffering isn't that entertaining.   It's definitely the devious selfish machinations where he delivers; his duplicitous actions are what'll get you all incensed and rooting for him to get nailed.

Grace Kelly is very gorgeous in this, but she's so bland and helpless too.  I felt like her character was being punished too much by the script, though. She's so tortured!  So often the damsel in distress is a boring character of function, just there as a beautiful thang to get threatened and rescued.  Even though she's put through the wringer, at least she had some complexity beyond just being a victim.

I guess I was expecting this to be more crazy than it was.  It's so highly rated, that set me up for something more than what it is - a tightly wound mystery thriller - sorta like a CSI episode.  It feels like a play and that makes sense since it was originally a Broadway production by Fredrick Knott, and he adapted the screenplay as well.  Maybe I'd have liked it better if I saw it in 3D, like it was originally shot.

One scene made me laugh, one cop is walking off with some evidence: a women's purse.  He's got it dangling dainitly on his arm, and as he sets off on his way back to the station, a detective stops him short. "You can't walk around like that, you'll get arrested." And the cop puts the purse inside a satchel to cover up the gender crime.  Holy eh? You'll get arrested!  This is really true though.  At one point in English history, you could be arrested for wearing clothes that didn't define your gender "properly".  It's the actual legal reason behind Joan of Arc getting burned at the stake.  In hindsight, it makes more sense that Albert Nobbs was so terrified to be outed.

In case you're wondering, the Hitchcock cameo is in BITD school photo of the blackguard Milland.

Journey 2: Mysterious Island

directed by Brad Peyton (2012)

This was fambly night at the theatre.  Promos are usually packed and this one was no different; there were children everywhere, babies even.  At one point, a baby started to cry, and then when another one picked up the whimper, I was a bit worried there would be a chain reaction with the whole theatre erupting with bawling kids, but their moms got them quieted down quickly.

I was sitting next to one guy who was by himself and I don't think he was used to being around kids.  A boy was sitting next to him, maybe 8 or 9, and the kid was going in and out to the lobby for snacks or to the bathroom or whatever, just bouncing around like young kids do.  He did this back and forth business about 3 times politely excusing himself by the guy, and by the 4th time, old dude was getting huffy and breathing loudly with exasperation.  Jeez man, this is a G-rated promo, whaddya expect?

The movie was ok. It lacked tension, but the 3D special effects were really good, and there were some comical bits with Luis Guzmán, the helicopter dad - not that he was a father who hovered around his daughter, (in this case Vanessa Hudgens),  he's a for real helicopter pilot.  I liked his character best.  He was funny and silly,  and seemed to be having the most fun.  Michael Caine was pretty great too, but he usually is.  The Rock?   meh, he did his usual stoic, I'm a manly man, yet I have a marshmallow heart too.

It's so not a taxing or complicated flick, but it looks really good, and if you can channel your inner 10 year old, you'll have a really good time getting caught up in the improbable adventure.  Even though it's kinda boring for grownups, kids will love it. 

And maybe they'll be inspired to read the books by Jules Verne.  I really, really, liked them when I was a kid.  They're awesome oldtimey SF fun.

Also, while searching for an image for Jules Verne books, I discovered this collaborative mural project.  Some gorgeous gorgeous murals to be seen at that link - one of them at Jules Verne Elementary. :)

The Darkest Hour of The Sitter in The Adventures of Tin Tin

3 movies tonight, and saved the best for last, so I'll lead with it here.

The Adventures of Tintin is probably my favourite 3D movie going experience of the year. Yeah, I'm gonna stand by that. Tintin is tops in my book. It was a fulfilling film, way better than Hugo at the 3D, but not because the technique was better, because Scorcese really dazzled at that. Tintin succeeded more because the story was so much better at non-stop adventure. It starts off with an amazing 3D title sequence done in old school animation, but really popping with the 3D, sorta like the titles of Casino Royale, then it movies on to the I dunno what to call it? Almost realistic human type animation? I think it's mocap stuff, but the people are all squat with massive hands, so the proportions aren't real, but everything looks kinda real. Video game real would be the closest analogy. It looks odd but good.

Anyhow, you don't have to be a fan of the original Hergé comics to enjoy this, though if you are you'll like picking up on the cover scenes and it's kinda awesome seeing cherished childhood icons brought to life. I never realised what a good egg Tintin was or that he was a teen, nor that Haddock was an alcoholic, though The Thompson Twins are as bumbling as I recall. If you like the Indiana Jones flicks, this comes really close to the spirit of those. I'm looking forward to the sequels and I'm sure there will be more. The main villain looks like Spielberg, so I figure the bad guy will look like Peter Jackson in the next.

The Darkest Hour was pretty okay 3D action. It maintained tension well for the most part. I was scared of the aliens and even though the deaths are telegraphed, I was surprised by one. Too much stupid girl needing to be rescued scenes, but the very cool Russian landscapes redeemed the story lacks. It's a fun movie, and I bet it'll be even more fun as a video game.

The Sitter, well I liked it better when it was Adventures in Babysitting. 

The only thing it really had going for it is Jonah Hill with his charismatic shtick. There were other funny performances but the movie is pretty fucking bad. I liked some parts of it, Sam Rockwell was good as the crazy drug dealer but the ethnic stereotypes were pretty wack, especially the way the adopted El Salvadoran kid was portrayed as a firebombing antisocial thug, but you know in spite of its flaws, I did enjoy it. It wasn't very long and it was often offensive, but it had a good heart.

Also, the trailer for The Hobbit looks amazing. I like that story better than Lord of the Rings, so I know I'll be anticipating that one. The 3D Star Wars? I think I'll pass.

BTW, I am so sick of movies about the 1%. SPOILERS!!!!

Jonah Hill's character easily scores $3 grand snatching envelopes at a super swanky bot mitzvah and then robs his dad's jewelry store? The Darkest Hour has Emile Hirsch and his jetting to Moscow to broker a deal for his 4squareish dating app, and Tintin has old Captain Haddock getting back his mansion and gearing up to recover his family legacy of a cargo hold of gold? Geez!! As Jonah Hill says to the kid in The Sitter, you ain't got problems, nope you've got money and I don't buy that mo' money, mo' problems bull, well it's prolly true, but hell I think most people wouldn't mind changing up their lack of money woes for mo' money woes.

A Very Harold and Kumar Christmas - 3D

directed by Todd Strauss-Schulson (2011)

It was amusing, especially considering I no longer fall within the target stoner demographic and I wasn't high. Stoners are pretty easy to entertain and I bet the 3D would have been that much more impressive for those that partook before hand. There's one section that's essentially a commercial for the technology. Step right up and getchur 3D TVs folks!

Aside from the running gag with the baby accidentally getting messed up on various drugs, it was chock full of decent fambly values. I liked Elias Koteas as the Russian gangster boss, but none of the other characters stood out much.  Oh yeah Patton Oswalt was funny, but he was barely in it.  I thought I'd like Danny Trejo's character more, but ehn, ethnic stereotypes kinda irk me. Actually, this flick is full of that kinda shtick, so I tried not to notice all the irksome bits. I couldn't help it though, because even though I was deliberately grading this flick on a curve for obnoxiousness, there were quite a few irksome bits related to sexuality that I didn't like. The bit with the guy wanting to get with the slutty virgin who couldn't get any was bleagh, also I didn't like Harold's replacement best friend who got stuck in the closet - was that some kind of joke about him being closeted? And I really disliked the continued use of the pathetic "star" cameo character - Neal Patrick Harris as Neal Patrick Harris and, you know what? He's not gay, that's just a ploy so he can manipulate his way into getting women to trust him so he can make super sleazy moves on them because he's just that fucking horny and unethical. These scenes making light of the dynamic of sexual assault were gross and off putting. Rape is not very funny, neither is lying about rape, but that was another scene and I don't want to go break down what all was messed up about that one. I guess I'll just end my criticism of this flick's sexual offences with this: sexuality issues can be amusing, but it's pretty easy to cross the line into offensive and insensitive.